Saturday, 22 January 2011

Sleep Deprivation

Sounds bad, doesn't it? Going to work when you feel like you need another three week's worth of sleep? Well this isn't going to be one of those bastardly cheesey posts where I go "LOLNO." It is a bad thing, people prove this all the time by fucking shit up while they're really tired. In fact, I'm inclined to agree that the Iraqi war was a direct result of some tired fuck not getting his shit together and telling Corporal Insurgentfucker the wrong shit. Fuck you, private.

The fact is this, if you find yourself balls deep in your eight hour sleep every night, you will miss out on shit. The best things in your life will happen after 12am, fact. I have no sources for that information so have a picture of someone's face.

It's 12am here.

This isn't to say that you should go get mortal drunk every night of the week. You will get fired from your job and then you won't be able to afford your precious lifestyle. Don't be a dick. Back to the point of getting 8 hours sleep... A lot of people work at least 37.5 hours each week, that's 7.5 hours a day in a 5-day working week, and 8 hours spent at work if you're entitled to lunch. I fucking love lunch.

Now, let's assume it takes you at least half an hour to get to work, and at least half an hour to get ready for work. There's 9.5 hours of the day wasted on work straight away. That leaves 14.5 hours of your day left, take away those 8 hours sleep and you have 6.5 hours of your day to yourself. What the fuck are you going to do in 6.5 hours? Fuck all if I'm honest. Family time, maybe a quick drink in a pub?

But then you'll look like a fucking faggot if you leave at 9:00pm for your bath and bed. You fag.

In the interest of having an awesome social life, sleep deprivation is a fucking brilliant idea. Make it all up at the weekend, because apparently you can bank sleep. No excuses now, you wuss.

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